Wherein Lies the Truth?

Yesterday I started ruminating on TRUTH after reading Red Dirt Girl’s post. She asks if there is such a thing as “the absolute truth”. It’s not clearly as straightforward as I had once thought.

Some truths are completely obvious and verifiable. For example, if you look out the window and see puddles forming, you can truthfully say, “It’s raining.” It’s something you can say with certainty.

But then, what about “It rained every day last week.” This one depends on memory unless you go to the trouble of looking at historical rainfall. Two people are likely to disagree on this.

But what’s the truth about how rain makes you feel? Some people would say “Rain makes me sad and depressed.” Others might say “Rain makes me feel content because it is so nice to listen to.” This is the gray area about truth because it calls into play perception. A group of people can perceive something many different ways, thereby making it difficult to even determine the truth of the matter.

Then there’s a statement made after the person in question is long gone, like “Mom always loved you better than me.” This is the ultimate in perception. If Mom were around, she would probably deny it even if it were true. But as far as the speaker is concerned, it is the truth.

Here’s something that actually happened. I had the following conversation with someone I know and love yesterday:

Him: I have been angry with you for months because you said you would never hire me.
Me: When did I ever say that?
Him: When I was talking about possibly falsifying my resume to cover up the long break in employment.
Me: Given that I know you suffer from “scrupulosity” (a form of OCD), I knew that you would never falsify your resume and that you were just baiting me. I told you that I was sure as an interviewer that I could tell if someone had done that and yes, I said I would then be unwilling to hire that person.
Him: But you still said it and it really bothered me.
Me: Let me assure you that if I were in the position to hire you, I would do so based on your actual credentials with no need for embellishment or falsification.

So here we have an example of how very misleading and far from the actual truth a statement taken out of context can be.

Red Dirt Girl is in the midst of an ugly divorce. Divorce often brings out the worst in people, causing them to “bend the truth”. Does that mean “to lie”? Not necessarily. You can often do considerable damage just by remembering something just a little differently. If you try hard enough, you can actually replace what happened or what was said with what you would like to remember. It becomes the truth as far as you are concerned.

So how about using a lie detector test? Sadly there are ways to pass such a test even if you are guilty. So there is no real litmus test for truth.

The bottom line is that my truth and your truth may bear no resemblance. But does that make them any less the truth?