O Christmas Tree

I just remarked to my husband that my last Christmas tree was probably in 1975, the year before I converted to Judaism. He suggested that we had saved a lot of money over the years. I calculate over $1200 at $40 a tree. I actually have no idea what Christmas trees cost these days.

I distinctly remember lying awake at night worrying not about changing my religion so radically, but about giving up Christmas and especially my Christmas tree. About the only home religious rituals I had were centered around Christmas.

It’s funny that never since that time have I actually missed the tree. I’ve always enjoyed looking at how my Christian friends decorate their trees, but there is no envy.

My daughter, on the other hand, begged for a tree for years. She still remembers the Christmas we spent with my parents, when she and her brother got to decorate the Christmas tree.

I am still occasionally asked if I miss Christmas when people find out that I was a Christian for the first 27 years of my life. I tell them in honesty the only thing I miss is the music. For many years I sang in the National Presbyterian Church choir. Our annual candlelight service was the highlight of the year. I remember with goosebumps when the octet I sang in opened the service with an a capella version of “O Come, O Come Emanuel.” I no longer sing in that choir, but I remember all the words and I sing along with the radio.

Just today I was thinking that I actually have the best of both worlds. I have the experience of celebrating Christmas, of believing in Santa Claus until I was 10 years old. But today I can leisurely shop for the handful of Christmas presents I give. I can make a few cards for special friends. I can be a guest at someone else’s Christmas dinner. But no one expects me to do a thing! It doesn’t get much better than this.

I did carefully wrap the ornaments from my childhood and store them in the basement. Statistics would say that one or both of our children is likely to end up with a non-Jewish partner. They may choose to carry on their grandparents’ tradition.

Tomorrow I will celebrate Christmas as Jews around the country do – go out for Chinese food and a movie.

Soon thereafter the trees of this year having served their purpose and lost many of their needles will take their place at the curbside waiting to be picked up and turned into sawdust.