Graduation: The Beginning of the Rest of Your Life

I remember that uneasy feeling of getting out of college and not knowing what I was going to do next. Graduation has this way of throwing you out into the world. My parents never suggested that I come home to live. They didn’t offer to keep me on the payroll. It was understood that I was on my own as I took off to go to Europe after graduation. I had worked a second job at a bar in addition to my computer center job to earn enough money to pay for the trip. But I had no assurance of what would happen after my return. I don’t remember being especially worried, just assuming that something would work out.

My children are in much the same position right now. Dan graduates from law school at the U of Arizona in mid-May. Rachel graduates from Tufts with a bio-psych degree just one week later.

Last fall Dan was feeling a little panicky as he applied for jobs for after graduation and nothing was working out. He expressed interest in possibly working in San Francisco or someplace well outside of Arizona. He had been working at a firm in Tucson for 6 months while going to school. It became obvious that they really wanted to keep him. They kept upping the starting salary until finally he said yes. Even though he may eventually choose to practice law elsewhere, he has an excellent start at a place that already knows what a great lawyer he is going to be.

Rachel on the other hand is a bit more challenged. Her bio-psych degree represents phase one of additional schooling that results in some sort of PhD. Granted, she could stop with a bachelor’s degree and get a job, but the salary would be quite low and the work might not be terribly challenging. So my child who is artistically gifted, who has a spectacular GPA, and who succeeds at everything she tries has some obstacles to overcome as she attempts to sort out her future. She has so many wonderful skills, but it is unclear as to what she is going to do with them. Contrary to Dan, who went immediately to law school, Rachel has had enough school for the time being and needs a break. It will be interesting to see what she chooses to do.

So what happened to me that summer of 1971? Three weeks into my trip to Europe I found out that I had a job offer from the FBI (with a starting salary of $6,800) and at the same time my best friend forever FL offered me a spot in a group house in the Wesley Heights area of Washington, DC. I quickly accepted both. I stayed 5 years in the group house, well after FL left. I lasted only 3 months at the FBI – just not my kind of place. But it was a job and getting another job when you are already employed is far easier. There were times when my checking account hovered around $0 and thank God I didn’t even use a credit card at that time. But I always had enough to eat, a roof over my head, and parents I could have relied on if absolutely necessary. Sometimes I miss those carefree days of living close to the edge and being responsible for no one but myself.

I hope both of my children find happiness in the next phase of their lives. I hope their new-found independence is filled with loving relationships and rewarding careers. Is it asking too much to also hope for grandchildren some day?